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Hi! My name is Elisa Haggarty, I’m a Conscious Leadership Coach and the host of The School of Unlearning. Each episode will feature the most curious and successful people I know, what beliefs they carry with them today and the ones they struggle to unlearn. Come ready to reflect on your core learnings and rethink social constructs so that you shed the life that the world told you to live, and begin living the one meant for you. Welcome, to the School of Unlearning.
Episodes

Wednesday Jun 29, 2022
EP 33: Donna Jackson Nakazawa On Helping Our Daughters Thrive
Wednesday Jun 29, 2022
Wednesday Jun 29, 2022
For episode 33 on The School of Unlearning, I sit down with award winning researcher and author of 6 books, Donna Jackson Nakazawa. Donna's work in science journalism was influenced by early life experiences and losses. Donna's most recent work is all about raising awareness about the growing mental health crisis that our young girls are experiencing. Donna uses science, empathy and a felt sense for human suffering to translate stories into movements that spark change. This episode is for every parent, even aunt, every teacher and every coach who is raising a young women and wants to help support their mental health journey.
In this episode, we discuss:
- Donna's early childhood influences and how they shaped a sense of trust and safety about the world around her
- How to tell is the nervous system is regulated or dis-regulated
- How stress switches on genes that dis-regulates the nervous system
- What motivates and drives Donna to be a writer and a speaker.
- How we can rewrite internal narratives to work through trauma
- How confidence is a backbone for healing trauma, to be able to sit with emotions and narratives and learn to rewrite them.
- The power of narrative writing, which combines the past, present and future in a way that can heal.
- Science is showing that in the fact of unpredictable chronic stress, things happen immunologically and hormonally in the female body that set the stage for depression that don't happen for males.
- Doubling and tripling rates of female mental health disorders which are unprecedented.
- The rate of female teen suicide went up 50% over the last decade.
- 36% of girls report having a major depressive episode before the age of 17.
"Girls on the Brink: Helping Our Daughters Thrive in an Era of Increased Anxiety, Depression, and Social Media" is available for pre-order on Amazon, on Barnes & Noble. This book will be released on September 13th.
About Donna:
Donna Jackson Nakazawa is an award-winning science journalist, author of seven books, and an internationally-recognized speaker whose work explores the intersection of neuroscience, immunology, and human emotion. Her mission is to explore the science of the mind-body connection and harness it for healing. Her upcoming book, Girls on the Brink: Helping Our Daughters Thrive in an Era of Increased Anxiety, Depression, and Social Media (Random House/Harmony 2022) is available for pre-order now and will be available wherever books are sold this summer). In this book, Donna explores today’s growing adolescent female mental health crisis. Anyone on the front lines of caring for girls today—parents, educators, counselors—knows that girls are more prone to depression and anxiety than ever before. Now we have the science to understand why. During the critical neurodevelopmental window of adolescence a confluence of modern toxic stressors are altering the female stress-immune response in ways that can derail female thriving. Drawing on insights from both the latest science and interviews with girls, Donna guides readers through 15 “antidote” strategies to help teenage girls flourish even in the face of stress, creating a new playbook for how we—parents, families, and the human tribe—can ensure a healthy emotional inner life for all of our girls.
About Elisa Haggarty:
I am a Conscious Leadership Coach and host of The School of Unlearning Podcast. I coach leaders/executives and teams all over the world to shift their mindset so they can build high performing teams, visit www.elisamaryhaggarty.com
Follow The School of Unlearning on Instagram.

Wednesday Jun 22, 2022
EP 32: Kate Vellos on Friendships & Creating Community
Wednesday Jun 22, 2022
Wednesday Jun 22, 2022
For episode 32 on The School of Unlearning podcast, I speak with connection coach and author, Kat Vellos. In a world where friendship and community feel transient and so different from how any of us imagined our worlds to be, Kat Vellos helps us break open human connection with a refreshing approach and perspective on how we can forge and maintain friendships - even as they shift and change. In this episode, we cover how Kat came about the work of researching human connection, what she is actively unlearning and how we can more intentionally build communities and friendships that help us move through life. If there ever was a time where we all needed a reframe human connection and practical tools on how to intentionally build community, this would be it.
On this episode, we cover:
- Who influenced Kat as a young adult
- How activism and social justice came to be a big part of Kat’s early moments of unlearning
- Unlearning productivity is top of mind for Kat and learning the freedom to explore the question of, “when is enough enough?”
- What role that leisure and pleasure have to do with productivity
- Sufficiency as a concept relating to abundance
- What successful friendship and community looks and feels like for Kat
- The ability to know the need for connection and reach out for it without hesitation
- The gift of reaching out and inviting a friend out
- How we can build muscles for connection
- What role generosity plays in making connections and friendships
- How the pandemic impacted human relationships and friendships
- Social stamina and how its impacted our ability to connect
- What would be nourishing, rejuvenating and connecting with the time and space we have in our lives?
- Why anger is a normal response to disconnection and what our emotions can teach us
- Tips and tools on how to foster adult friendships
- Bringing intention to the ways we create invitations
- How Forging adult friendships requires creativity
- How "hyper mobility" impacts our sense of community
- "If you knew you were going to I've at your current address for the rest of your life, what would you do differently to foster friendship and community?"
- The role compassion plays in forging relationships in a hyper mobile world.
- Advice on how to not take things personally if friend hangouts don't materialize
References:
Kat mentions the work/writing or Naomi Klein
Devin Price “Laziness doesn’t exist”
Lynn Twist’s book, “The Soul of Money”
The Podcast, "Hurry Slowly", by Jocelyn K. Glei
Susan David, "Emotional Agility"
Kat Vellos is a connection coach and trusted expert on the power of cultivating meaningful friendships. In her former career as a user experience designer, she researched, designed, and advised on the user experience of countless flows in digital products serving millions of people at companies like Slack and Pandora. With the publication of her books, We Should Get Together and Connected from Afar, Kat turned her background in UX design towards combating the loneliness epidemic to help millions of people experience greater wellness and fulfillment through thriving platonic relationships.
My favorite line from Kat is: "Productivity is about what you don't do".
Books and events: weshouldgettogether.com
Work: katvellos.com
Twitter: https://twitter.com/KatVellos
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katvellos_author/
About Elisa Haggarty:
I am a Conscious Leadership Coach and host of The School of Unlearning Podcast. I coach leaders/executives and teams all over the world to shift their mindset so they can build high performing teams, visit www.elisamaryhaggarty.com
Follow The School of Unlearning on Instagram.

Wednesday Jun 15, 2022
EP 31: Marc Champagne on The Power of Questions
Wednesday Jun 15, 2022
Wednesday Jun 15, 2022
For episode 31 on The School of Unlearning podcast, I sit down with podcast host and Mental Fitness Coach, Marc Champagne. Marc believes that we are just one questions away from a different day, and perhaps, a different life. We explore what drove him to use questions as a means to find clarity and what he has learned from his interviews of the world's greatest minds. Marc is the author of "Personal Socrates", a book where he examines the minds and core questions that drive the most successful and creative people of our times.
You can learn about Marc on Instagram @behindthehuman and follow his podcast, Behind The Human.
About Elisa Haggarty:
I am a Conscious Leadership Coach and host of The School of Unlearning Podcast. I coach leaders/executives and teams all over the world to shift their mindset so they can build high performing teams, visit www.elisamaryhaggarty.com

Wednesday Jun 08, 2022
EP 30: Ksenia Brief on Play, Personas and Following Our Divine Spark
Wednesday Jun 08, 2022
Wednesday Jun 08, 2022
For episode 30, I sit down with Ksenia Brief, the founder of Breakfast Criminals and host of the Ksenia Brief Podcast. Ksenia and I really let loose on this podcast, we rumble with what it means to use social media responsibly and dive into what it means to follow our divine spark. Ksenia was born and raised most of her life in Moscow and found herself growing up in a world filled with red tape, judgement and consequently craved more connection and creativity. This podcast is like a warm cup of ceremonial cacao, rich and full of secret moments of goodness.
In this episode we cover:
- Ksenia’s childhood growing up in Russia and how her brief stint in Australia influenced her sense of self and ability to dream.
- "Face Control" was a decisive way to control who got into clubs and who didn't and how this impacted Ksenia's sense of self.
- How Ksenia has used and embraced food and meals as a way to express love and build community
- We wonder where music videos have gone and discuss the impact they had on our imagination and social connection as children
- Ksenia's evolution and softening into self worth and remembering who she is beyond awards, social media.
- Why none of us can skip the step of compassion if we wish to break habits that don't serve us
- The role of responsibility in sharing stories and in spiritual teachings
- The role of playing personas in our life to keep life and relationships novel and playful
"It's only hard when we try to be more than human. We didn't come here for easy, we came for evolution our soul was meant to experience." Ksenia Brief
About Ksenia:
Ksenia Brief is the founder of the award-nominated digital platform Breakfast Criminals and the host of the Ksenia Brief Podcast, focusing on expanded consciousness and entrepreneurship in the digital age. Named “35 Under 35 In Wellness'' by Wanderlust and “Top Social Media Coach” by Yahoo Finance, Ksenia is here to merge our inner tech (intuition) with outer tech (social media) for a world where you feel at home to share your medicine. She does it through storytelling, consulting and online programs.
She currently lives in a tiny home in the Catskills and can be found drinking ceremonial cacao at sunset.
Follow Ksenia's podcast, "The Ksenia Brief" podcast on Apple and Spotify. Her work can also be found on Instagram, @ksenia.brief
About Elisa Haggarty:
I am a Conscious Leadership Coach and host of The School of Unlearning Podcast. I coach leaders/executives and teams all over the world to shift their mindset. Together we move from serious to curious and from fear to love. To learn more about my work, visit www.elisamaryhaggarty.com
Follow The School of Unlearning on Instagram.

Tuesday May 03, 2022
EP 29: Somatic Intelligence with Jordan Dann, LP
Tuesday May 03, 2022
Tuesday May 03, 2022
Jordan’s Dann joins me for episode 29 on The School of Unlearning podcast. This episode is a deeply personal one, and Jordan leads the way by sharing how her childhood experiences have shaped the way she sees relationships and her work as a therapist. This is one of those feel good, wanna hug her through the screen and share with everyone I know podcasts - enjoy the conversation my friends.
In this episode we cover:
- How Jordan’s parents and early childhood influenced her view of relationships
- How moving houses so often helped influence Jordan’s resiliency and strength.
- Stumbling upon influential people and theater helped open up a sense of belonging and connection to the body
- The role of play in intimacy and connection
- How movement helped shape our sense of self and community
- How Jordan landed in therapy after years in music and theater.
- What somatic therapy and intelligence is and how to use it
- How presence and noticing influences the way Jordan works with patients and clients.
- How to embrace the sympathetic nervous system
- Why we need to annihilate our need for isolated self growth
- What 3 subjects Jordan would add to our school systems
- What Jordan is actively unlearning these days
Resources
If you liked this episode, check out the book Jordan references, “The Body Keeps the Score” by Bessel van der Kolk.
Jordan mentioned the poet, Marge Piercy, click here to read more.
About Jordan Dann
Jordan's work as a therapist is strongly informed by her clinical training in Gestalt therapy, Imago Relationship Therapy, and Somatic Experiencing. Jordan’s approach to working with clients is a strength-based-trauma-informed approach to support self-healing of the individual.
Jordan has a BFA (acting) an MFA (theater education) from Boston University and am a graduate of the Gestalt Associates for Psychotherapy. Jordan is a Nationally Certified and NYS Licensed Psychoanalyst in private practice. She works with individuals, couples, and conduct case supervision in New York City.
Jordan is an avid content creator and I highly encourage you go check out her Instagram account where she shares informative videos and stories that are buzzworth. She has also been featured in MindBodyGreen, NewsBreak, and Psychotherapy Networker.
To follow and work with Jordan, click here.
To learn more about Elisa and her work as a Conscious Leadership Coach, click here.
Follow The School of Unlearning on Instagram.

Tuesday Apr 26, 2022
EP 28: Joy & Sorrow with Shawn Askinosie
Tuesday Apr 26, 2022
Tuesday Apr 26, 2022
In this episode for The School of Unlearning, I sit down with the author, founder and CEO of Askinosie chocolate.
I first came across Askinosie chocolate via Shawn's book, “Meaningful Work”. I read this book and fell in love with his spiritual and thorough approach to finding a vocation and meaning in our personal lives. I immediately searched for the nearest store that sold Askinosie chocolate and bought a bar. I’ve been hooked ever since.
This episode is deeply personal, a conversation between two people navigating grief, joy, loss, meaning and yes, chocolate. Shawn urges us to look to what breaks our heart in order to find meaning in our lives and in our work.
In this episode you'll hear:
- What core learnings Shawn had to endure at age that shaped his worldview on religion and grief.
- How important the space to talk about grief is and what happens when we don't have that space.
- How joy and sorrow are inseparable and how they amplify each other.
- The influence of loss and ambiguous loss in daily life
- How sitting with and moving through grief can build emotional confidence
- The origin of Askinosie Chocolate and the values behind it.
- What relationship driven chocolate means to Shawn
- How storytelling makes chocolate taste better :)
- The importance of space and alone time in finding meaning in life and in work
- "Begin with your sorrow" to find purpose and meaning in work.
- Why healing isn't a singular or a linear experience
- What Shawn is actively unlearning in the present moment
"Maybe if we combine our sorrow? Maybe that's joy?" Ross Gay
Check out Shawn’s TED Talk here.
To enjoy direct trade chocolate made by Askinosie chocolate, click here.
About Elisa:
I am a Conscious Leadership Coach and host of The School of Unlearning Podcast. I coach leaders/executives and teams all over the world to shift their mindset. Together we move from serious to curious and from fear to love.

Wednesday Feb 02, 2022
EP 27: Why We Desire What We Desire With Luke Burgis
Wednesday Feb 02, 2022
Wednesday Feb 02, 2022
On episode 27 for The School of Unlearning, I sit down with professor and author, Luke Burgis. Luke recently wrote the book, "Wanting: The Power of Mimetic Desire in Everyday Life" and on this episode he helps unpack what mimetic desire is and how we can more intentionally identify and choose what we want in life. Luke helps us more consciously examine why we want what we want and nudges us through his tactics in the book, to remember what it means to be human.
In this episode you will learn:
- How a few core learnings influenced the way Luke grew up
- How Luke came across the work of French Theorist, Rene Girard on mimetic desire
- What mimetic desire is: comes from the Greek work, "to imitate"
- Why our desire to mimic is innate in all humans and why it's not something we want to get rid of, but rather, intentionally embrace
- Why it’s important to question what we desire
- Why the drive to become a business "unicorn" is skewing our vision of success
- What role fear and threat play with mimetic desire
- How social media highlights and fuels mimetic desire
- What role compassion plays in mimetic desire
- How emotions like anger can spread the fastest on social media because, "the lack of strong bonds between people, allows anger to spread faster"
- How we can view social media as one step in the direction towards connection vs the entire medium to fix complex issues
- How embracing silence is "spiritual distance" and why this is a key tactic in Luke's book, "Wanting"
- How Luke defines unlearning and what he is actively unlearning in the business world
About Luke:
Luke Burgis has co-created and led four companies in wellness, consumer products, and technology. He’s currently Entrepreneur-in-Residence and Director of Programs at the Ciocca Center for Principled Entrepreneurship where he also teaches business at The Catholic University of America. Luke has helped form and serves on the board of several new K-12 education initiatives and writes and speaks regularly about the education of desire. He studied business at NYU Stern and philosophy and theology at a pontifical university in Rome. He’s Managing Partner of Fourth Wall Ventures, an incubator that he started to build, train, and invest in people and companies that contribute to a healthy human ecology. He lives in Washington, DC with his wife, Claire, and her crazy New Orleans cat Clotille.
About Elisa:
I am a Conscious Leadership Coach and host of The School of Unlearning Podcast. I coach leaders/executives and teams all over the world to shift their mindset. Together we move from serious to curious and from fear to love.
Forget what you learned, work is a medium for connection, play and yes, love. Click here to work with me.
Become a patron here: https://www.patreon.com/thesoulpodcast/membership

Wednesday Jan 12, 2022
EP 26: Reframing Mental Health with Dr. Andrew Hill
Wednesday Jan 12, 2022
Wednesday Jan 12, 2022
On episode 26 for The School of Unlearning podcast, I sit down with Dr. Andrew Hill. Dr. Hill founded Peak Brain Institute which offers neurofeedback, a form of brain training that helps treat depression, anxiety, ADHD and many forms of brain trauma. We cover Dr. Hill's journey into neurofeedback and his take on how we can show up for our brain function through nutrition, brain training and more.
Dr. Hill is one of the top peak performance coaches in the country. He holds a Ph.D. in Cognitive Neuroscience from UCLA’s Department of Psychology and continues to do research on attention and cognition. Research methodology includes EEG, QEEG, and ERP. He has been practicing neurofeedback since 2003.
In addition to founding Peak Brain Institute, Dr. Hill is the host of the Head First Podcast with Dr. Hill and lectures at UCLA, teaching courses in psychology, neuroscience, and gerontology.
All listeners of my podcast get 50% off their brain mapping with Peak Brain, go check them out in LA, NYC and St. Louis…and if you aren’t in those spaces, no worries, Peak Brain now offers virtual support with the same high touch care.
In this episode, you will learn:
- The pivotal moment that turned Dr. Hill onto the power of the brain’s capacity to heal
- How his work in gerontology and many forms of psychiatric care have influenced the way he approaches neurofeedback and patient care
- What neurofeedback is and who benefits most from it
- How to think about making small changes that influence disease
- How anxiety is a normal brain circuit and how to rethink the way we frame mental health
- The role sugar plays in chronic health conditions
- Why western medicine hasn’t helped spread the word on the benefits of neurofeedback but why Dr. Hill is still motivated and hopeful for more people to get this life changing training
About Elisa:
I am a Conscious Leadership Coach and host of The School of Unlearning Podcast. I coach leaders/executives and teams all over the world to shift their mindset. Together we move from serious to curious and from fear to love.
Forget what you learned, work is a medium for connection, play and yes, love. Click here to work with me.
Become a patron here: https://www.patreon.com/thesoulpodcast/membership

Wednesday Jan 05, 2022
EP 25: Terri Trespicio on Unfollowing Your Passion
Wednesday Jan 05, 2022
Wednesday Jan 05, 2022
On episode 25 for The School of Unlearning podcast, we are joined by author and entrepreneur, Terri Trespicio. Terri's new book, "Unfollow Your Passion" is a provocative inquiry into some of life's common assumptions. This podcast is filled with moments of unlearning about relationships, how we blindly inherent narratives that don't serve us and Terri argues that our best growth comes within our comfort zone, not outside of it.
On this podcast you will learn:
- Who has influenced Terri while she was growing up
- How comedy has shaped Terri's voice
- Why Terri maintains she is at her best when she allows for space in failure and growth
- Disappointing someone isn't the end of the world, seeking to always please is.
- Why our innate drive for connection leads us to accept things that don't serve us.
- Why its essential to decide who you will listen to and who you won't.
- Terri's relationship with saying, "no", and why saying "no" doesn't always needs to come with an explanation.
- How women have been influenced to always feel they need to be in a relationship, and why it's unfair to feel "less than" if you are single.
- What a "full body yes" feels like
- Why getting to a "yes" requires a lot of "no's".
- Why saying "yes" when you don't need it, it's a recipe for drama.
- Why drama is expensive in relationships and on teams.
- Why "discomfort isn't a guarantee for growth, its a condition."
- Real growth does not come outside of our comfort zone, despite what struggle/hustle culture tells us.
- Terri urges us to expand our comfort zone so that we can live and work inside it.
- Passion is an experience, not a state, it's not a talent and we need to stop seeking it all the time.
- Why our needy pursuit of passion is ironically draining us and largely, diverting us from the joy of living.
- Terri on unlearning: "When you unlearn, its not a forgetting, its purposeful, learning is the acquisition of knowledge and application in the world, unlearning is amending, its what editing is to writing. Unlearning is the next step of knowledge."
Quotes from Terri:
“As soon as you start to monetize something in order to legitimize it, you’ve lost it.”
"Passion is when energy is moving through you, where can you allow that to happen?
“The minute you get fixed and rigid about finding passion in one thing, you’ve killed your own vibe.”
"Pay attention to where industry or the need to do a thing comes in. Beware of trying to sell or market every last ounce of passion you have.
To learn more about Terri Trespicio, click here.
About Elisa:
I am a Conscious Leadership Coach and host of The School of Unlearning Podcast. I coach leaders/executives and teams all over the world to shift their mindset. Together we move from serious to curious and from fear to love.
Forget what you learned, work is a medium for connection, play and yes, love. Click here to work with me.
Become a patron here: https://www.patreon.com/thesoulpodcast/membership

Tuesday Nov 23, 2021
24: Mo Gawdat on Loss, Happiness & How We Can Teach AI To Be Kind
Tuesday Nov 23, 2021
Tuesday Nov 23, 2021
We all know that the rise of technology isn't going anywhere. We also know that there is a spike in mental health concerns worldwide and in this provocative interview, former Google executive and author, Mo Gawdat shares his view on how we can shape the future of technology and AI by simply being better, kinder humans.
In this podcast, you will learn:
- How Mo's younger years growing up in in the Middle East influenced his worldview on religion, gender and problem solving.
- Mo's love for science and math growing up and how this helped shape his confidence and capacity to do meaningful work.
- What motivated Mo to bring happiness to millions of people
- How science and spirituality merge and compliment each other
- How resisting life never equates to peace and happiness
- The influence of Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor on Mo's worldview and growth
- How the left and right hemispheres work together in synergy
- Why computers and technology are already smarter than humans
- The 3 tenets that make humans human featured in "Scary Smart"
- How a moment of alive connection with a stranger is intimate and full of life.
- What role neuroplasticity plays in our capacity to influence technology and how it shapes us
- What Mo is unlearning and how he thinks of it as a "coming home"
Follow Mo on Instagram at @mogawdat and his podcast on Apple, "Slo Mo".
About Elisa:
I am a Conscious Leadership Coach and host of The School of Unlearning Podcast. I coach leaders/executives and teams all over the world to shift their mindset. Together we move from serious to curious and from fear to love.
Forget what you learned, work is a medium for connection, play and yes, love. Click here to work with me.
Become a Patron! This podcast is and always will be a labor of love and community. Thank you for contributing to keep The School of Unlearning ad free. Our learning and unlearning never ends, so let's do this together.
Become a patron here: https://www.patreon.com/thesoulpodcast/membership